The right way to deal with negative people needs to be learned if you do not want to become more and more negative yourself. Compassion and empathy are important tools.
You may know that: Some people are extremely negative. They make you feel like you just want to run away. You can not do anything about it and you feel powerless somehow. Sometimes we can just escape these situations and go in a different direction – but often that’s just not possible. Here’s the question: Is there a way to deal with these negative people?
I’ve also found myself in situations where I’ve been surrounded by negative people in the past, and I’d like to introduce you to four ways in this article that have helped me handle it better.
1. Develop compassion with difficult people
The first option, which I always find very helpful, is to try to understand the other person first: where does this person come from? What has she experienced in her life that she has become so negative?
Many people who do not live consciously are a product of their environment – how they were educated and shaped by society. There are people who grew up in harsh circumstances and that has left their mark. If we now develop the understanding that this person has become like that, and especially if we also see that this person actually suffers from this negativity (even if he may not even be aware of it), then it can develop a kind of compassion in us.
Thereby we can understand that this negativity is not meant to be evil towards us, but that this human being is actually completely helpless and is held captive by this negativity.
Compassion is a very natural feeling and I think it is simply much more pleasant to face a person with understanding than with a feeling of anger. Otherwise, like a vicious circle, we inherit this negativity ourselves, and that’s the last thing we want to do.
So, this first point helps us to develop empathy, creating a sense of compassion and understanding. So we can break this vicious circle of negativity.
2. Consider the situation as a challenge
The second way to deal better with negative people is simply to see this situation as a challenge. It can be a way to check yourself out where you are.
When we do yoga or meditation, we are usually interested in evolving and overcoming our limitations. One of the limits that defines us very strongly in our lives is emotional: we do not have complete control over our emotions. That’s why we’re often limited because we’re experiencing negative emotions that we do not really want to experience.
Through a more conscious life we gain more and more access to control these emotions. In situations where we deal with negative people, we have the opportunity to see how much control we have actually gained over ourselves – or how quickly we let ourselves be carried away by this negativity. This can be an important feedback for where we are in our development right now.
In these situations, we can also practice mastering one’s own emotions and internally isolating oneself from this negativity. It’s not about blocking anything that person says, but about accepting it and trying to understand that this negative person is actually in a very pitiful situation and that it has nothing to do with us. So we can see these situations as a challenge and use them as well.
3. Help the other person to grow
Once we have truly developed this compassion and understanding, then we can consider if we could possibly help that person. Sometimes it can be helpful to give subtle or very clear hints. Of course, that depends on how we are familiar with that person, how close we know each other and of course you have to know how far you can go.
I think compassion is a very good foundation to help the other person. Of course, this does not succeed if we allow ourselves to be angered and then let ourselves be seduced into a heated discussion. But if we really are in control of our emotions and have a clear view of things, there may also be a way to help that person further.
4. Protect yourself from negative persons and avoid them
The fourth possibility is that we try to shield ourselves from negative people. Personally, I think that is absolutely justified in some situations.
You have to make that decision for yourself and individually. First of all, it is of course important if this is possible at all. Is the negative person a stranger on the street? Then I can just go on. However, having a close relationship with him makes it harder. But then you can eventually end the relationship or simply avoid it.
It also depends on which development you are in right now. I have this image of a small, young plant in mind: In the beginning, if this plant is still very small, you have to protect it from external influences, so they have any chance to set their roots and grow. But as soon as it gets bigger, you can not close it off too much, because the wind and the storm help the plant to grow and become stronger. This will allow the plant to lower its roots even deeper into the soil and become even stronger.
So you have to look where you are in your personal growth. Am I more of a young, sensitive plant right now, or am I at a stage where I take every challenge in my life to drive my own growth?
If you feel that you are surrounded by negative people and you just can not cope at the moment, then I think it is important and justifiable to consider whether you can not exclude these negative people to a certain extent from your life , maybe only temporary.
Because if you just can not develop this feeling of compassion or you do not want to face that challenge and maybe this person can not help you, then it is often a good option to orient yourselves in a different direction and to try others positive To gather people around.
I hope these four points that help me in dealing with negative people over and over again may also be helpful to you. If you liked the article, feel free to leave a comment! I would be glad!